Friday, July 2, 2010
Feeling bad again (a common occurrence with me)I do things I don't want to do (even when I know they are wrong), I look at pictures of myself and totally understand why my life is what it is. (in regards to relationships particularly) There's always a constant battle within me to have to do things I don't want to, like walk the dog, feed the pets, do things around the house, I struggle most often when I just want to do my own things and have to get up. I struggle with trusting people to like me, esp. after they've been upset with me. I struggle with the idea of taking the steps to move out on my own. (or with someone else) With not knowing if I'll be ok financially, and whether I'll ever feel secure in a job. (which I never have) I struggle with the idea of having to find my own accommodation and worry that it will be a challenge. I struggle with the idea of loving someone for the rest of my life and with the possibility that they may never acknowledge me again, let alone like me, and how incredibly hard that will be.